Where we are in the process...

Hi everyone, it’s been a little while since my last post, so I thought it was time for an update. I apologize in advance for any grammar mistakes! Jerry usual edits the blog posts for me, but he has been so busy with work lately, being that it’s the end of the school year and all.

So we are about 2/3 done with our home study, just waiting on a few more forms and finishing up the last of the paperwork. We have also started our Dossier, which is majorly overwhelming!!! Our adoption agent has been wonderful in answering all our questions, but there is just so much information, document gathering, plus everything we have to do to the documents. I feel like I’m under a mountain of papers, specific government regulations, and the ever-mounting costs of doing a dossier. Once G is home, I will hopefully know what it feels like to fully breathe again. :)

We were hoping to have G home with us in August, but that doesn’t seem likely now. The cost of everything has slowed things down quite a bit and we are trying to figure out how to pay for it all. It’s very stressful. We also haven’t been able to talk to him in a while. We weren’t even able to talk to him on his birthday! :( Every call we make we end up talking to another child in the orphanage that speaks broken English and they hardly can tell us where he is in the English they do know.

When I feel overcome with sadness that he isn’t here with us, won’t be here this summer, and become overwhelmed with all the costs that are slowing things down a lot, I can’t help but tell myself God will provide. God knows our story, He wrote our story, God will provide. I fully believe that! Unfortunately G won’t be here this summer to have two parents that love him so much and want to be right there by his side. It might not happen in my time, but it will happen in God’s and He will provide! We appreciate all the prayers and positive thoughts that people have and continue sending our way!

So on a lighter note, I thought I’d share a little story about when G was here. When G first arrived he would sleep well into late morning. The first week or so we figured it was because of the time change and jet lag, only to find out later that he was actually staying up late, pretending to sleep when we checked on him, and looking at the new books he had been given. So after discussing with him that he has a bed time so that he can get up and do fun things during the day, that still didn’t seem to help lessen his desire to stay up just a little later and look at the books. We played around with different times to start waking him in the morning, so he wouldn’t sleep the day away. We found that 8:30 am meant he wasn’t tired and he’d still have a great day without getting tired during the day. The only problem was that he was so hard to wake up. We would seriously spend anywhere from a half hour to an hour slowly getting him out of bed. Every morning I would go in singing, “Rise and shine. And give God your glory glory…” while opening his shade and continue to try and get him out of bed.

One day G and I were in the car and Taylor Swift’s, “Shake it off,” came on. He started dancing and singing with the biggest smile on his face. Later another Taylor Swift song came on and he was singing and dancing again. That’s the day I found out he is a huge Taylor Swift fan. While laying in bed that night replaying my day, as pretty much all women do, I had an idea. What if I played some Taylor Swift songs and danced around while waking him up.

So the next morning, after doing some shopping for music the night before, I opened his door and sang the usual rise and shine song. There was no movement. Then I started to play “Shake it off,” and a foot started to move with the beat. Then the other started to wiggle. Soon he jumped up on the bed and started dancing and singing. We soon found out he’s a huge Maroon 5 fan too, which I was more than happy about, and added them to our play list. Every morning after that I continued that routine, even noticing sometimes he would already be up, but pretend to sleep (kiddo, I just saw you get up and walk to the bathroom and back to your bedroom)just so we could have our dance parties together. I started adding in new songs that he’d hear on the radio for the first time and tell us he really liked. I miss those morning dance parties very much.

As the paperwork keeps piling up, my hands keep cramping from filling out forms, and the cost of everything becomes scarier and overwhelming, I, again, keep reminding myself that God has a plan and I’m pretty sure God wants me to have my dance partner back just as much as I do. :)

http://www.gofundme.com/jerrysarahadoption

The app is in on the joke....

While G was here we taught him a lot of English and he taught us some of his language. I'm usually pretty good at hearing the words and repeating them to remember for later, but for some reason saying good night in his language gave me a hard time for the first couple of weeks. Every night after hugs and tucking G in we'd say goodnight in English and then we'd follow it up with saying goodnight in his language. For the first two weeks G would look at Jerry and they'd both laugh because I'd just screwed up the words in his language. I could have sworn I was saying it correctly, but finally one night I did get it right and we all high fived and hugged again. After that night I'd intermittently get it right, but G and Jerry would always look at each other, smile, and shake their heads like I'd said it wrong again. They were always nice but loved bonding over my inability to get it right. It was always like there was this inside joke, which I didn't mind. It was harmless, and G was always good about it.

As you may have read, we should be staying in G's country for about a month the first trip. So, I have been trying to learn more of his language so we can communicate with the locals. I started using a language app that says the words, then listens to you saying them and tells you if you have said it correctly. If you did there's a bright ding and a green light. If you did not there's a buzzing noise and a red light. Well, I was moving along and was really doing well and kept getting all these green lights. As soon as goodnight came up I of course smiled, thinking back to G's time here, but was determined to get that green light and move on to another word. The app said it in G's language and then gave me the go ahead to repeat. I repeated it and was so proud, I just knew I said it correctly, until a red light came up and it buzzed! I did it over and over again, getting the red light and buzz! Finally I got a yellow light, which meant I got it partly correct. I started to laugh because it felt like the app was in on the joke! I'm not sure I'll ever be able to say good night in his language completely correct, but I won't stop trying.

I am looking forward to the day I can hug him, tuck him into bed, say good night in English, and keep trying to say goodnight in his language to him again!

http://www.gofundme.com/jerrysarahadoption

As sweet as bonbons

G loved helping me bake. He helped me bake and decorate so many Christmas treats when he was here. Every year Jerry and I make cookie tins for friends and family and give them as host/hostess gifts or just as a little something special for people. G loved that we were giving them to people and he could tell them he made them. He loved the praise and positive attention, it was adorable! One of G’s favorite cookies to make and especially eat were Oreo bonbons.  You could whisper those words and no matter what part of the house he was in, he somehow heard those words and was right at our side, hoping we were about to indulge in some. 

G also loved Christmas music. In the beginning he’d sing along and any words he didn't know became Christmas tree. So I’m dreaming of a White Christmas became, “I’m dreaming of a White Christmas, With every Christmas tree Christmas Tree…” It was super cute! After we made bonbons and he realized how much he loved them, bonbons became his Christmas trees.J So Jingle bells became, “Jingle bells, Jingle bells, Jingle bon bon bon, bon bon bon, bon bon bon, bon bon bon bon bon!” He absolutely loved bonbons. J

When it came time to get his water bottle for his plane ride home, we found one that had a little secret compartment for snacks under the water bottle. G and I thought this was pretty cool and I knew Jerry and I had to fill it with something special for him. So the night before he had to fly back to his country, Jerry grabbed a couple of bonbons and put them in the secret compartment. The next morning I asked G to take a look in his room and make sure we didn't forget anything. He came out, said we were all good and started looking in his backpack to make sure his water bottle was in there and some other things I told him I’d put in there for him. He lifted his water bottle and felt something shift in it. A huge smile crossed his face and he said, “Special snack?” I said yes and told him he should open it and see what was inside. He opened it, saw the bonbons, jumped up and down, hugged me, and then ran off to hug Jerry. 

Like any child his age, he is an eating machine. So I had a backpack full of snacks for him for our day of traveling. I frequently offered him snacks and reminded him he had the bonbons. Every time he wanted a snack he opted for something else. When we arrived at the airport and had waited around for the rest of the hosting families to arrive, two young boys approached him and the three of them quickly shared all of their adventures from the past four weeks. When all the sharing had calmed, G ran to his bag, grabbed the photo album we made him and the two bonbons. He handed each of the young boys a bonbon--he shared his favorite snack and his only bonbons with his two little friends. My heart soared and I could not have been any prouder of him at that moment. G is such an incredible and sweet boy! We miss him very much!

http://www.gofundme.com/jerrysarahadoption

Tag the Bag

Hi Everyone!  

So, I've been on Pinterest A LOT trying to find fun and creative fundraising ideas and I came across one that we've decided to put a little spin on. It's called tag the bag. The general idea is that you take a suitcase and write all the names of the people that have donated to the adoption efforts. The post I read had them using the suitcase in their travels and then auctioning it off in the last phase of the adoption. We don't want to do that part though. What we'd like to do, is write all the names of the donors who have helped our adoption fund on the suitcase. Then give it to G when we get to the part of bringing him home, so he has it forever. Even though he's had a rough start in life he'd always be able to look at that suitcase and see that there are so many people out in the world that love him and want the best for him.
So starting today if you donate(any amount) your name will go on a suitcase for G. If you've previously donated your name will be put on the suitcase as well. If you donate anonymously and would like to stay anonymous (meaning, I won't put your name on the suitcase) please indicated to me in a response to our personally written thank you email.
Thank you so much to everyone for helping us try to bring G home!

http://www.gofundme.com/jerrysarahadoption

Talking with G

  When our hosting period ended, Jerry and I tried to contact G multiple times every week to no avail.  Finally, with the assistance of an angel on earth, and the woman I credit for us even meeting G in the first place, we were able to Skype with him two times this week! Oh how I've missed that gorgeous smile!  He was so happy to see us and asked if we were coming to get him tomorrow. I tried to explain how things take time, but hopefully soon. We've started scheduling more Skype dates, but I'm  worried that something will happen and he won't be able to get on the computer or his internet will be down. From what I understand his orphanage is in a small town and internet can be spotty. I can not wait for the day we don't need Skype to talk and we can see him face to face and give him all the hugs and kisses he deserves.

http://www.gofundme.com/jerrysarahadoption

The start of our journey...

Jerry and I have a unique story, especially as to how our relationship began. We met through mutual friends (one being one of my sisters:)) and after we started dating, we quickly knew how much we loved each other. Jerry proposed less than two months after we started dating and ten days later we were married. A full wedding and everything. Jerry and I had both been praying for God to help us find who He wanted us to be with. Well, God answered loud and clear. :) We had decided to wait to have kids a few years after marriage, so we could settle in as being a couple. I like to think of it as most people date for a year or two, then get married, settle in for about a year then start having kids. We just skipped some of the dating part. :) Then we started trying to have kids. Nothing. Then something, then a miscarriage. Nothing would happen again for a while, then something, then a miscarriage. This happened more times than I would like to count. I prayed and asked God why. I have wanted to be a mother as far back as I can remember and it felt like a cruel joke over and over again. Jerry and I had taken tests and all was good according to the doctors. They had no idea why getting and staying pregnant wasn't happening. We moved from state to state a lot in the last six years, which helped a little, having something to distract, but of course being a mother has always been in the back of my mind. When we looked for new homes, I'd always look for what room our child would have and imagine where the Christmas tree would sit so that when they came out of their room on Christmas morning it would be a magical experience for them. I'd think, "Would they come down the stairs and the tree would be right there? Would they run down this hall and through the kitchen to the living room and there the tree would be? Would I be able to see their faces when they saw the tree if it was in this room? This would be an awesome playroom!" Things like that, so motherhood never left my mind. Nor did my hope of becoming a mother. Even with all the loss, I just had faith God would provide.
     Provide he did! Just not in the way we had planned, but just the way He planned. In early November, we received an email asking for a host back up family for a child. Hosting is were you welcome a child into your home and family for a set amount of weeks. Sometimes it's five weeks, other times its four. As soon as I saw it, I was overcome with this need to email Jerry right away and say, "Let's do it!" Jerry, being the practical one, said we should find out more information and pray. So we prayed and discussed over and over again. We both just felt so led to host. So, three weeks later, we welcomed an amazing and energetic boy into our home, family, and especially our hearts. He was with us for four weeks. We put a calendar in his room with upcoming events, appointments, play dates and visits from our friends on there so he knew what to expect each day. At the end of each day he would draw what his favorite things about the day had been. Sometimes it would have multiple pictures. He'd draw us sledding, going to church, playing basketball with friends, and almost every day one of his favorite things that he would draw was the three of us sitting at the dinner table all together for dinner. He never took anything for granted and appreciated everything that a family was about. When I asked him what he wanted for Christmas, he didn't know what to say. I asked him if he wanted typical American things, Avengers gear, Legos, and a bunch of toys. He was overwhelmed by the idea that he could ask for something, even something small. When he understood that he could ask for anything, within reason (I had a typical kid in my mind), he asked for shirts and pants. That was all he felt he needed. It broke my heart and filled my heart with even more love because of how sweet this child is. I have even more stories of his sweetness from just his four weeks here, that I'll share along with our journey. When he went back, it was one of the hardest goodbyes we have ever had to say. "G" touched the heart of everyone he met. When I say he is an amazing boy, I mean it, he truly is. Just like God answered my prayers with Jerry, He answered our prayers with this boy. This is why Jerry and I are trying to adopt him! Please join us on our journey and help support us as we make our way through paperwork, travels, court hearings, and (hopefully) ultimately bringing this wonderful child home with us.
     Adoption is very expensive, about $30,000. I think it's important that you know where your money is going if you want to help us, which we greatly appreciate. Home study fees are usually around $3,000 and adoption agency fees: they provide home study coordination, dossier assistance, filings for US and international government adoptions, assistance with training and international travel arrangements, and a whole lot more. Then there is also travel: we have to spend 26 days in his country the first trip and then two shorter trips after that and each trip is approximately $1,500 each just for airfare. In addition there are fees that go to both governments (there’s one processing fee that’s $4,000, with a translation fee of around $1,500!), getting a visa for him to enter the US, and bringing him home to us.
     Our first $3,000 will go to the home study and filing fees. So once we reach $3,000 we can start the home study!

http://www.gofundme.com/jerrysarahadoption